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OMG!">OMG!

The Back­street Boys have a new song! Why did nobody tell me this until I was lis­ten­ing to the Top 40 radio sta­tion in my car?!?

Yes, I AM totally seri­ous about being excited. I am unashamed about my love for the Back­street Boys, Brit­ney Spears, and Kelly Clark­son. I will have you know that I can rec­og­nize a song penned by Kevin Richard­son (the older, dark-haired one, and a Broad­way actor in his own right) before the first melodic “Ye-ah,” thank you very much– doesn’t mat­ter if it’s Celine Dion or some­one else I’d never oth­er­wise lis­ten to singing it. And I once heard LIONEL RICHIE sing a KR-penned song. Bliss, I tell you. Pure bliss.

Come on. You’ve watched Amer­i­can Idol, or real­ity TV, or eaten squirt cheese or whipped cream straight from the can at least once in your life, right? And you LIKED it. Admit it. I bet you’ve even acknowl­edged the awe­some­ness of Cool Whip right out of the freezer, straight, on a spoon. Oh, wait, maybe that one’s just me.

I will admit “Boys” is per­haps not the best name for them any­more (check out Howie’s reced­ing hair­line in the video, which has les­bian vam­pires, and spinny dance moves, and NO KEVIN RICHARDSON AAAAAH HE WAS MY FAVORITE, what does he MEAN he wants to have a fam­ily and life???) but still– there’s melody, and a dance beat, and MAN, this brings me back to vir­gin daiquiris at the Bahama Beach Club in Saugus.

Ye-ah.

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