We are now those people

Sun­day night the Bet­ter Half and I went to the movies and real­ized that we are now those peo­ple we used to mock as we sat mak­ing out with our high school dates, snarfling pop­corn and candy like calo­ries were irrel­e­vant and oth­er­wise liv­ing ado­les­cent, ego-centric lives.  Not so now.

We got off the sub­way and came up to street level and made our first and most impor­tant stop: the CVS, home of cheaper soda, candy and nuts than the movies.  Eleven bucks yielded diet soda, San Pel­le­grino, Milk Duds, Peanut M & Ms (i.e., the world’s most nutri­tion­ally com­plete candy) and a bag of (shelled) pis­ta­chios.  That same money would just earn you the right to order in the the­ater.  Food shop­ping accom­plished, I stuffed these healthy snacks into my purse so that the folks at the the­ater would not send me away for bring­ing some­what afford­able food inside.

Next, we pur­chased our tick­ets and pro­ceeded to our assigned the­ater.  Along the way, I became Extremely Antsy and just man­aged to sti­fle the fol­low­ing inner tirade: “What’s wrong with this stu­pid teenager in front of me?  He’s on his phone, weav­ing like he’s drunk in pants hang­ing off his ass and it’s impos­si­ble to go around him, he’s so unpre­dictable and IF I DON’T GET A GOOD SEAT BECAUSE OF HIM I AM GOING TO BE MAD.”  Ahem.  So, yeah, I kept that part quiet.  (You’re wel­come, sweetheart.)

Then, seats found, we dis­cussed var­i­ous items of inter­na­tional polit­i­cal import while ignor­ing the TWENTY MINUTES of ads and prod­uct place­ments and web-only trailer pro­mo­tions before we even got to the actual pre­views, dur­ing which there were more ads.  I did declare it then and declare it so now– the stuff on that screen before the actual movie shall hence­forth be known as TrailerTrash.

And then the movie came– we laughed, I got weepy at one point, and we both had a grand old time right through the end.  Includ­ing the end of the cred­its.  All of them.  We were the last ones in the the­ater while the cleanup crew hugged the walls want­ing to know why the hell we cared about Foley Artists.  (We just do, alright?)

So yeah– we are food-smuggling, credit-watching, trailer-ignoring cranky old peo­ple.  We didn’t even kick the back of anyone’s seat.  What’s up with THAT?

(We saw Star Trek.  It was really, really, really fun, and the Kirk/Spock dynamic was really well done.  I knew I was always a Trekkie, but I didn’t think I was that much of a geek until I caught myself wait­ing for them to trot out every character’s catch phrase or man­ner­ism.   At least I didn’t whine that the dimen­sions of the “Real” Enter­prise were much smaller than the ones in the movie.  *Cough* Bet­ter Half *Cough*.)